Their Perfect Time Together

Their Perfect Time Together

A baby lays asleep on the couch snuggled in her travel bassinet while her older sister plays games on her iPad, learning her ABCs and singing along with songs as they came up in her game on ABCMouse.Com. The TV plays a child’s show but neither baby nor child pays attention to it. Their mother sits tiredly on the couch, her eyes lovingly watching her baby sleep for a few minutes before her exhausted gaze shifts to where her oldest daughter sits at her feet. She may feel like a zombie but it is well worth the exhaustion, the stress, and everything else that comes to raising an independent loving little girl and bringing another strong baby girl into the world even though the world has become so confused and full of hate. Their mother sighs heavily as she thinks about having to raise these girls in the strange world, her mind and heart heavy. She looks at her daughters and hopes that they grow into beautiful, smart, independent, loving, caring women who won’t let the world or those living in it change their hearts or steer them off their path towards whatever it is that they wish to be when they grow up.

Her eyes wander to the couch beside her where her amazing husband sits, staring down at his laptop that sits propped on his black lap desk, his eyebrows knitted together as his fingers slide across the keyboard, the man never done with his work for the Navy and always giving his all to make sure that everyone is taken care of medically. The enjoyable clicking of the keyboard and the sight of her husband brings a smile to her face because she knows that she is not alone in raising her two daughters. The world may be scary but she knows that with the help of this incredible man beside her, their daughters will stand a chance. And with their families and all of their friends behind them, their daughters will always have the help they may need and will win in this crazy life of theirs.

She returns to her writing, a story flowing forth from her imagination and pen. She continues to write and to work on the story before her eyes, knowing that she must strive to work hard, get published, and show her girls that their dreams can come true if they keep striving for it, work hard, and never give up. Her eyes leave the page that she is writing on a few times as she looks to her sleeping sweet baby, to her older amazing daughter, and her perfect reliable husband, feeling truly blessed and at home with her little family. Her pen flies across the page, her mind whirling with thoughts and ideas, and a smile stays plastered to her face because as she sits there on their couch, she feels like this is their perfect time together. She can’t wait to make more beautiful memories as a new family of four, having already made some amazing memories as husband and wife and as a family of three. Life is an adventure and she knew that she has a great group of people to enjoy it with.

Amazing Story

Amazing Story

As I had stated in an earlier blog, I had the amazing opportunity to meet a fellow blogger who wishes nothing more than to spread positivity to those in relationships. Well I am pleased to say and share with you the link that will take you to his website where you may read my story. It was a hard story to write because it was a hard topic for me to admit to but I am glad that I wrote it. My husband has also read it and he loved every bit of it because it spoke of love, truth, and how I am working on becoming a more verbal person in our relationship. Yes, I am talking about communication and how I struggled and still sometimes struggle today to use words on how to express myself in our relationship together. I still have that issue in other relationships but his and mine is the most important relationship where communication needs to be open and I need to be more willing to express how I am feeling or what is bothering me verbally and not just in writing.

I hope that you will visit his page and read the story that this blogger known as, InspireYourMarriage, has written that includes my story about communication and mine and my husband’s relationship. But I also hope that you will take the time to read the other blogs he has written with other people’s stories about their relationships because I think you will enjoy them. And if you have a positive story that you would love to share with the world, then by all means contact this blogger through his page and tell him that you have a story that you would love to share with him, his blog, and with the community on the Internet.

Here is the link to his blog that includes my story about myself and my amazing husband. I hope you enjoy reading his blog as much as I know he has enjoyed writing it. I too loved reading it and am pleased with how my story has been spun into his blog. If you read this, InspireYourMarriage, thank you again for allowing me to be apart of your blog.

https://www.inspireyourmarriage.com/2018/09/17/laceys-story-opening-up-verbally/

It’s In Her Smile

It’s In Her Smile

Dedicated to our sweet youngest daughter, Cara Lynn Gordon. ❤

Big beautiful brown eyes stare up at me from her bassinet and a giant smile crosses over her face as she stares back into my eyes. Our second miracle baby had graced us with her presence earlier than August 4, 2018. She decided that she had and we had waited long enough and came to be with our happy little family of three on July 23rd at only 38 weeks and 2 days and made us an even happier family of four. She came out kicking and screaming to world that she has arrived and that she has a world to take over, her smile being one aspect that will help her achieve that goal.

Her smile is big and full of love even if she is so little and so young. I can’t get enough of her smile when she looks at me or someone else, especially when she gives that huge beautiful smile to her daddy and her favorite big sister, Kierra, and you can’t help but feel loved by this little person. I feel so blessed to be able to have a second daughter, a second child, and a second rainbow baby after yet another heartbreaking miscarriage. I just hope that I can continue to be a good mother and raise her to be a wonderful loving human being just like her older sister. I fear for her and her older sister because of how totally screwed up this world has become. All of the hate is ruining such a wonderful place and I doubt that it’ll get any better unless the human race wakes up but will that happen? Most likely not in my lifetime or theirs but one can hope that one-day the world will wake up and become more peaceful. But until then I will raise my girls the best that I can with the help of my amazing husband by my side and my wonderful family and friends since they say it takes a village to raise a child or children and I have the best village beside me. And I will continue to get lost in those wide brown eyes and that big beautiful smile as she grows.

Love you to pieces, our little pumpkin, our Cara Lynn. I can’t get enough of your amazing smile and can’t wait to see you grow into who you are meant to be. Well of course I can wait because I wish to enjoy every second of your life, watching you grow up right before my eyes. You are an amazing baby already and just like your big sister, you have such a beautiful smile and great big dazzling eyes. Your personality is already shining through and I know that you are going to be an amazing little girl. And if you ever need help, I am here and so is your daddy. Your big sister will also always have your back. Love you always, pumpkin, never change that smile so that it can always melt our hearts and bring a smile to our face.

Keep On Laughing Baby Girl

Keep On Laughing Baby Girl

Dedicated to our oldest daughter, Kierra Lee Gordon. ❤

Blue eyes that have shifted to their gorgeous gray as she grew and brown fluff hair that had fallen out as a baby and sprang back to be a beautiful blonde, a thoughtful, smart, kind, and mannered baby girl has become our first rainbow baby back in 2013. With a due date of January 2, 2014, she decided to grace us with her presence on December 28, 2013 and we couldn’t have been any happier.

After dealing with three heartbreaking miscarriages, Kierra came to us as our first rainbow baby, our first miracle baby, and our first strong bay girl ready to over come my body that didn’t want to carry full term for some mysterious reason. Her smile brings smiles to those around her and her laugh causes those having a bad day to have a better day. She has already quite the imagination and loves to play with others or with us or by herself.

She loves to say hi and bye to those who stand watch at the bases, making most of them smile and say hi and bye back to her. She says strange things, things that doesn’t make sense sometimes, and things that makes us laugh, making her our funny unique little girl. She is obsessed with Disney TV shows and movies, especially The Nightmare Before Christmas and even though I have seen it a millions times over because of her, I will watch it a million times again just to see her smile and chat about Jack, Sally, and Zero. I love watching her play or do artwork. I love listening to her talk and blabber about this or that, and I really love to hear her laugh. I fear that this world will turn that pure soul and pure laughter into a sad soul and a fake laugh but I know for a fact that she is strong so maybe she will not change. We will teach her to keep her head held high, to love life, to keep on laughing, and to make the right choice, not changing her funny little personality.

No matter what our love bug, keep on laughing, and this world will never be able to bring you down. We can’t say it enough how much we love you, Kierra Lee, inside and out. You and your baby sissy are our world and our lives. The world is yours so don’t ever let it get you down, keep fighting for what you want, and always know that you can come to mommy and daddy for any issue you may be having and we will do our best to help you out. But always remember love bug, keep on laughing baby girl, keep on laughing. We can’t wait to see you grow up into a wonderful woman but more than anything we can wait to see you grow up before our eyes because we want to treasure every single second with you. Love you to the moon and back, love bug!

Beating the Storm

Beating the Storm

The sea roughly pushes the ship towards the angry rocks as they captain struggles to turn the unresponsive wheel, his gruff grunting filling the ears of his crew. The two couples cling to one another as they sit in the belly of the ship and struggle to keep upright as the waves push on either side of the ship while their hearts pound in their chests, eyes wide with fear. Waves crash up against the side of the ship, the gray clouds hovering low in the sky, and the wind screaming at them as it tires to intimidate the small crew of the ship. The sails stretch as far as they can in the wind, nearing their ripping point as they battle to keep together. The captain yells to his crew orders to try to win the fight to save his ship, The Whispering Mermaid. His golden aged brown eyes fill in fear as the rocks loom ahead of them and his heart pounds in his chest at the thought of hitting the rocks, losing his crew, the guests, and his ship.

The waves slam the ship again causing the crew to nearly fall and the couples down below cling to one another as they to try to keep their seats, sliding a bit down the bench seats they are perched on. The angry sky spits out lightning and stronger winds, while the clouds begins to throw heavy rain down on the ship, the sails now bending downward. As he had feared, the Captain watches the storm grows stronger outside the front window, looming over them like an angry god. He turns his solemn golden brown gaze to his crew and wonder if it would even be safe for them to try to escape in the lifeboats with the hungry waves outside. Flashes of light race across the sky as images of the lifeboats being over turned by the monstrous waves frightens the Captain’s mind. Fear and dread makes his heart sink as he stares off to the horizon not sure what he can to in order to save everyone on his doomed ship.

The ship rolls dangerously to the left side then flies back to the right, spilling cold ocean water onto the deck, making it dangerously slippery. The captain feels the wheel slip out of his hands and he crumbles to the ground surrounded by his crew who had also lost their footing after the last tumble in the waves.

And as quickly as the storm had hit them, it vanishes, leaving behind beautiful blue skies and fluffy white clouds with a bright happy yellow sun happily shining down on the battered ship. The crew slowly pick themselves up off of the ground and quickly begin to check one another for injuries before they spread out to check the ship for any damage. They grab tools as they head out in order to take care of the ship while the Captain stands, collecting himself and taking a hold of the wheel in shaking hands. The couples appear on the bridge beside the Captain, visibly shaken by the entire experience, still clinging to one another. He reassured them that everything is okay and that his crew is checking on the ship to make sure that it is fine to get them back to land. The crew returns to let the Captain know that there was a few dings here and there but they have patched up anything that they needed, the ship still floating.

The Captain sighs happily as he turns the wheel so that they can head back to land and to safety. The ship silently cuts through the calm waters, leaving the Bermuda Triangle behind them and the freaky out-of-no-where storm that had hit, the storm vanishing deep inside the Triangle where it will wait for the next ship of plane that carelessly crosses that way. The couples head out onto the deck at the front of the ship, and they each let out sighs of relief as they let the gentler wind brush past them, calming their nerves. The Captain steers the ship back towards the dock so that he can deliver everyone safely away from the thought of another storm that could possibly hit again without warning.

Staying Positive in Relationships

Staying Positive in Relationships

I had the honor to receive an email from a man who loves to write blogs on relationships and the more positive sides of these relationships. We always have those relationships we hear about that are negative and quite a lot of times our media is over taken by stories like this form the rich and the famous. But when we get a glimmer of a positive relationship between anyone, we cling to it and enjoy it for what it’s worth, doing our best to ditch the stereotypical negative relationships. We of course will fight our loved one in any relationship and those fights do make us stronger, but when we look at a negative situation and help turn it into a positive one, then maybe our relationships will grow even stronger than if we just concentrate on the negative parts. So I was pleased when he approached me through my email asking for a story of mine that is positive and will hopefully help others and in turn I asked him a couple of questions so that we can get a glimpse into his mind as to why he wants to have blogs based around positive stories on relationships and couples. Here are not only his answers but his website so that you may go and read is remarkable blogs on couples and their positive relationships and how they are growing together with one another’s help.

And to the blogger Inspireyourmarriage, thank you again for wanting me to be a part of your blogs and for being a part of mine. I truly appreciate it.

What gave you the idea of having stories that are more positive in relationships?

The idea of having stories that are more positive in relationships came from hearing so much negativity and complaining about relationships and marriage. We need positive ways to deal with how to overcome problems in our relationships and positive stories on how other have dealt with a problem in their relationship.

We hear a lot of people complaining about their partner. Then to solve the problem, they resort to negative action. They get mad at their partner, complain, make demands, try to guilt them into meeting a need and resenting certain things about their partner. This frustration is justified, but those actions by themselves rarely solve the problem.

Then they go to their friends about the issue. First, it’s often just to complain or vent to get it off your chest. This is well-intentioned but not often helpful to the relationship and to solving the problem. When you complain about your partner to your friends, you go back to your partner with a sub-conscious negativity about them. Even if you’re just joking to your friends, you still have little negative thoughts about your partner when you see them again. This does not create closeness to them.

Second, if it’s an issue that they want help with, they will ask their friends’ advice on the situation. Their friends may be well-meaning, but can also often hurt the relationship more than help it. The reason is because their friends naturally want to take their side to show they support them. Simply taking their side doesn’t solve the problem. Also, friends don’t see a key ingredient to the marriage – your partner’s actions may simply be reactions to your actions. If your actions change, your spouse’s actions could change.

A classic example of this came from a recent story a wife sent to me. She made a negative assumption about her husband and didn’t give him the benefit of the doubt about something. This led to resentment on her part and negative behavior toward him from her, which only pushed him further away, both emotionally and physically. She tried to talk to her friends for help, which only made things worse. Her friends meant well, but they only received half of the story and vented their own relationship frustrations by taking her side without offering any way to solve the problem.

However, it all changed when she let go of the resentment and started acting more positively toward her husband. His reaction was quick and decisive – he started acting more positively toward her. They finally opened up and talked about what they each need from each other. They tried talking in the past, but because they had not been meeting each other’s needs, they both weren’t willing to budge.

Was it fair that one partner had to take the first step? Maybe not. But you can either be fair and possibly lead to divorce, or you can do what’s unfair and start the process of fixing the relationship.

So we need more stories like this of how couples have fixed problems in their relationship, rather than just venting about how bad their relationship is. Venting is ok once in a while, but don’t confuse venting with actually solving the issue in the relationship.

 

 

What made you want to inspire others through gathering stories of others and their relationships?

My motivation of inspiring relationships was for my own marriage. For years, my wife and I struggled to have a really happy and content marriage. There were a lot of ups and downs. We talked to friends, family, we read books, we went to counseling, and we tried to focus on religious teachings. We did everything and nothing worked. We didn’t have a terrible marriage, but there was just a layer of unhappiness and dissatisfaction in it.

Then I started reading a lot of various internet message boards of people asking for relationship advice. What slowly started to strike me was how people couldn’t see how their own actions were negatively affecting their relationship and likely negatively affecting their partner. We couldn’t see what their partner had to say about the situation, but it was clear their own actions often weren’t helpful to the situation.

It took a while, but I slowly started to see that my actions also weren’t helping my own marital situation. So to understand my own marriage better, I started to try to follow what people’s frustrations were in their relationship. I saw patterns of what their frustrations were. They had different scenarios and wording, but the problems started falling into distinct categories. This became the basis for the 10 Needs I developed.

The next thing that became clear was that people’s frustrations fell into 2 distinct areas. Either there was a lack of stability in the relationship, meaning they were still highly attracted to their partner, but their partner’s actions/behaviors were very frustrating to them and very unreliable. Or there was a lack of stimulation in the relationship, meaning they felt their life was steady with their partner, but the passionate desire wasn’t there any longer.

This revelation of the 10 Needs and 2 main types of needs led me to do a lot of thinking about my own marriage. The more I focused on fulfilling her needs that she wasn’t getting from me, the more she focused on my needs. Our marriage isn’t perfect now, but a lot of the frustrations we felt for years have mostly gone away.

Hearing all of this is what ultimately lead me to want to inspire other relationships. I felt the best way to do that was to post stories from people who had overcome issues in their relationship. I wanted to be a source of showing people how to overcome their own problems in their relationship.

The interesting thing is that it’s very easy to correlate how they overcome an issue with the 10 Need I developed on my website and my book at https://www.inspireyourmarriage.com/.

The Mysteries of the Afterlife

The Mysteries of the Afterlife

A country song has been playing quite a bit on the radio and it’s a great song. It’s called Heaven by Kane Brown and it this beautiful song talking about how people are in a rush to get to heaven because it’ll be amazing and all that but he has found himself a woman he calls his angel right here on Earth and he would rather stay with her. Like I said it’s a great song and it has me wondering about the future and the afterlife. This song and going to the thrift shops where you see old pictures of people who have lived years ago.

Ryan and I went to the thrift shops looking for a Halloween costume for myself and for our youngest daughter who will be 3 months old for her first Halloween. But as we looked around, we noticed a lot of items from the past including old photograph of people. I turned to look at Ryan and asked him if this is what will happen to all of our family photos and our other items in the future once we are gone, if all of our things will be in thrift shops like these items. He truthfully told me that it could be a huge possibility and that made me quite sad and wonder if we are wasting all our time and money on photos.

So all of this and watching those who are older passing and even those who are our age or younger passing away has e seriously wondering and questioning what is to come. I believe in God, Jesus, Heaven, and Hell but I also believe in an afterlife where there are spirits or ghosts who stay on Earth as I myself have experienced the paranormal side. And questions are now flowing through my mind where I have no answers. What will happen to us? I mean what really happens to us when we die? Do we stay on Earth as ghosts if we wish? Or do we pass through a white light and go to Heaven where we exist as we did on Earth where we can see one another and touch one another? Or will we just be a floating ball of energy while in Heaven or stuck on Earth in that form watching our loved ones as they grow up? Do we just simply not exist once we die and our souls go poof?

Yes I have heard that there are books about what some have seen once they had died and came back and no I have yet to read any but I doubt that will answer my questions fully. I might give some of those books a look at to ease my mind and these questions but I know that I will still be wondering and a part of me will still be curious as well as a bit afraid of what is to come when it’s my turn to die.

I don’t know what will happen or what to think will happen to us once we pass on but I have been thinking about it for quite some time now and would love to hear what others believe or think will happen to us once we are gone. Do you have any theories you’d like to share? If you do, please comment and let me know. I would love to read them and maybe it’ll help quiet my own wondering mind.